mental health content brief

Don't force yourself to be positive, and don't label your emotions as "sick". Small actions are far better than big principles.

Last year, I received a visitor who worked in Internet operations. During Double Eleven, I stayed up late for three consecutive weeks. I went home and fell on the bed and cried for 10 minutes every day. I also insisted on following the "positive psychological training" mentioned on the Internet and forced myself to write down three happy things that day. If I couldn't write it down, I would scold myself for having "poor emotional management skills." Instead, I couldn't sleep the whole night. I didn't do any complicated cognitive sorting for her at that time. I just said don't write if you don't want to. If you want to cry, just cry. After crying, you can eat a popsicle and do whatever makes you feel better.

In fact, there are different views in the industry. Most counselors from the cognitive behavioral school believe that when encountering negative emotions, you should first sort out the trigger points, adjust irrational beliefs, and solve emotional problems from the root.； However, most colleagues with a humanistic orientation are more inclined to "accept first and then adjust". There is no need to confront emotions from the beginning. Both options are supported by a large number of clinical cases. There is no absolute superiority or inferiority. It all depends on which one is more acceptable to the parties at the moment.

Not long ago, I was having hot pot with a friend. He complained that he didn't want to talk last week, and his office colleagues came over and asked, "Are you depressed?" It's not okay to have such negative energy." It annoyed him so much. Don't tell me, many people nowadays have misunderstandings about mental health. They think that "being healthy" means being happy every day, and being a little depressed or not wanting to talk means having psychological problems. A mental health center conducted a public perception survey last year, and the results showed that more than 60% of "self-diagnosed depression" in the general population are actually just short-term mood swings, which completely fail to meet the standards of clinical diagnosis - just like sneezing when you catch a cold, you can't say you have pneumonia after sneezing twice, right? Sadness, anger, and fatigue are normal human emotions. Allowing them to exist is much more important than suppressing them.

Don’t make caring for your mental health too complicated. It seems that if you don’t sign up for a mindfulness class or read a few psychology monographs, you don’t take care of your emotions. When I am overwhelmed with plans, I will go downstairs to buy a cup of iced Coke, squat on the roadside and watch the old men play chess for 10 minutes. Then I will go back and be much more efficient. I have seen clinical tracking data before, saying that for ordinary people who have not been diagnosed with mental illness, a cumulative 30 minutes of "purposeless relaxation" per week - such as walking in the park, petting a cat, or even lying in a daze - can improve mood by about 3% more than a one-hour standard mindfulness training once a week. Of course, there are many scholars who do intervention research and believe that systematic psychological training has higher long-term benefits. This is true. If you have not been able to sleep well for more than two weeks in a row and are completely unmotivated by the things you used to like, then you should really find a professional to make system adjustments. However, for most ordinary people who only occasionally emo, these small things that can be done easily are much more cost-effective.

In fact, I often tell people around me that mental health is really not that mysterious. It is just like taking care of your body. Wear clothes when you are cold, eat when you are hungry, rest when you are tired, and don’t always compete with yourself. It is more effective than any other principle. If you really feel like you can't take it anymore, there's no shame in seeing a doctor or a counselor. It's the same as taking medicine when you have a cold.