The most effective way to relieve depression and anxiety

Let me give the answer directly at the beginning: There is no "most effective" method that is universally applicable. Currently, the principle that has been clinically verified and generally reported by practitioners as the most adaptable is: first determine whether the emotional attributes are "short-term normal fluctuations" or "pathological symptoms", and then choose an intervention method as needed. Others may use miraculous methods, but they may not work at all for you. This is too normal.

Last month, a girl who works in Internet operations came to me for emotional counseling. She saved more than 30 "Anxiety Relief Tips" in her mobile phone memo, including meditating for 10 minutes a day, running 5 kilometers to secrete endorphins, and writing an emotional diary to clarify her beliefs. She tried them all one by one. Instead, she fell into deeper self-denial because "I can't even adjust my emotions well." Finally, she went to the hospital and was diagnosed with moderate depression. She took medicine for three weeks as prescribed by the doctor, coupled with short-term mindfulness once a week, and her whole state was visibly relaxed. I later talked about this matter with Dr. Li, a psychiatrist whom I am familiar with. He said that this situation is too common. Many people try various Internet celebrity methods as soon as they get started, completely ignoring that their emotions have reached a pathological level, just like having pneumonia and relying on drinking hot water to cope with it. Of course it is useless. According to clinical consensus, if you have suffered from insomnia and early awakening for more than two weeks in a row, have lost interest in all the things you used to like, and even occasionally have thoughts of self-harm, don’t hesitate to go to the psychiatric department of a regular hospital to register first. Any self-help method is not as effective as standard medication. Preliminary - There are always people who are afraid of the side effects of taking medicines, but Dr. Li often says that the side effects of new antidepressant and anxiety medicines are far less harmful to the brain and body than the disease itself. Patients who took it for half a year to see a doctor originally could have recovered after taking it for three months, but ended up taking it for a year and a half, which is a huge loss.

Of course, if you have just been busy with a project for two weeks recently, just broke up with your partner, or stayed up for several late nights in a row, and you just feel temporarily unmotivated and annoyed at every turn, then there is really no need to rush to the hospital. It would be more flexible to find a comfortable way to relieve such short-term mood swings. It's interesting to say that a fitness trainer I know will never touch the equipment when he is stressed. The more he practices, the faster his heart beats. Instead, he squats on the balcony and pulls out dead leaves from succulents for half an hour, and the whole person calms down. ； There is also a friend who is a designer who said that he could not sit still and practice mindfulness. Later, he found a method. When drinking milk tea, he took a serious sip of the salty and sweet taste of the milk cap, and when biting the pearls, he deliberately felt the Q-elasticity. In less than a minute, he was able to recover from the emotional collapse due to revising the draft - this is actually a simplified version of "mini-mindfulness", and the effect is really no worse than sitting for 10 minutes and counting your breaths.

At this point, some people may ask, there are so many methodologies on the Internet, how do I know which one is suitable for me? This has to mention the differences in the intervention ideas of different schools. No one is right or wrong, it all depends on which one suits you. For example, a counselor who practices cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) will be more likely to ask you to get rid of the exaggerated thoughts in your mind first: For example, if the boss only mentions a problem with your plan, you will default to "I want to be fired and I can't do anything well." If you get rid of this untrue thought first, your anxiety will often disappear by half. ； But a psychodynamic counselor may tell you not to change your mind in a hurry, but to squat down and ask yourself: Why are you so afraid of the boss’s disapproval? Did you get scolded by your parents when you failed in an exam when you were a kid? There is no difference between the two ideas. When you have an acute anxiety attack, use the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding method of CBT (say 5 things you see, 4 things you touch, 3 things you hear, 2 things you smell, and 1 thing you taste). You can get out of the near-death feeling in more than ten seconds. However, if you have been inexplicably depressed all year round and always feel empty in your heart and can’t find the reason, maybe digging out the old stuck points in your subconscious will be more effective.

I was anxious when I was working on a project two years ago. I woke up every day and felt like I had a piece of wet cotton pressed against my chest. I tried the morning jog mentioned on the Internet. After two days of running, my knees hurt, which made me even more annoyed. Later, I accidentally discovered that I would take a 10-minute detour after get off work every day to look at the red products sold at roadside stalls. The strawberries, the children running after me, and the electric fan pulled out by the fruit shop owner made the plastic sheets squeak. As I walked, the panic disappeared. Later I realized that this was actually "walking with mindfulness". There was no need to find a quiet room to meditate, as long as it was comfortable. I also tried to write an emotional diary before, and the paper was full of negative energy about scolding the boss and customers. The more I wrote, the angrier I became. Later, I simply changed it to jotting down some meaningless little things: "Today Grandma Zhang gave me half a bag of home-grown oranges downstairs." "The disposable chopsticks delivered today were of very good quality and I couldn't stop breaking them off." If I remember this, I will gradually stop focusing on those bad things.

In fact, many people's biggest anxiety comes from the obsession of "I must get better quickly." If others say exercise is useful, you force yourself to run. If others say meditation is useful, you just sit for half an hour. If you can't finish it, you scold yourself for being useless. This adds a new burden to your emotions. Really, you don’t have to force yourself to be a “top student in emotional management.” If you feel cold, just lie down for a while. If you want to eat something sweet, just take a few bites. If you can’t bear it anymore, ask a professional for help. Whatever method can make you feel a little better at the moment is the most effective method for you.